Not only does Edward not understand what a vegetarian is, he also has really bad vampire gas from only eating small animal's blood instead of the human blood that he needs in order to get enough protein. In this scene Bella inquires about Edwards unusually stinky vampire gas and why he always makes this "I'm concentrating" face when he lets one fly.
Mom's and women over 30 are still fantasizing about Edward Cullen though they continue to hide the Victoria's Secret catalog from their husbands.
Really? This is the guy women are getting excited about? I'm not much of a looker myself but this dude is a total douche. I called up an old friend of mine, Wesley Snipes and told him that I knew about this really wussy vampire dude that was conflicted about whether or not he wanted to be a vampire. Wesley told me he would take care of things.
Edward: Oops! I just let another one go, sorry Bella.
Bell: It's okay Edward, farting makes you like seven times more masculine than you already are.
Edward: Thanks for understanding my inner conflict. I just don't know if I want to be very masculine, this whole weak-sauce-vampire thing is really working out...I...huh, what? Nooooooooooo!
SWORDS, SLASHING BLOOD (not the vegetarian kind) AND GORE!!!
Blade: That's right sucka! Who's a vegetarian now?!
SURPRISE ENDING!!!!! HA HA AH AHA AHAHAA HA AHA HA HA AH AHHAHAHAH!!!!!!!
If you don't know who Blade is, look here.
11 comments:
Matt was right, this is pretty funny. Hope people hop on over to look at it. :D
I think I just cried from laughing.
No velociraptors?
Jared: I'm glad I could help.
Pablo: Sadly, there wasn't enough budget for velociraptors and Blade, and Wesley Snipes tested better with target audiences.
Dang. I laughed so hard. Ed and my bro thought it was hysterical. I still can't believe you said douche though.
Being that there is no other word to describe Edward Cullen, I had to say douche. Oops! I said it again...but it's true and everyone knows it.
Hilarious! I'm afraid to say it on this blog but I did enjoy the books, they are fiction afterall. I do agree though; I have no idea what all the hype over the guy who plays Edward Cullen is. Ben, you are WAY better looking than the douche!
Thanks Mom, mother's bias, but I'll take it.
I am a fan of Twilight the books and Twilight "Ben's Rendition," I'm having a tough time deciding which is better, Good Job Ben!
Edward is so anthropocentric.
Classic, I should send a tip to summit entertainment and they would probably include some of your plot. My family won't let me touch the books anymore just because a couple times I read it out loud and added some animation to make it more realistic, then for some reason they snatched it out of my hands and grouched at me.
Post a Comment